27 October 2007
Next Fruitcake: Our Lady of Guadalupe
I have succumbed to the continued pestering of a frequent commenter, and my next fruitcake will be from Our Lady of Guadalupe, a Trappist abbey in Oregon. I'm being glib--no pestering was needed, not after the horror that was Hickory Farms. I'm always up for an abbey fruitcake. These guys wouldn't let me order less than two of them, a little strange, but since they're one-pound fruitcakes and the total before shipping was $22, not a big deal.
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Guilty, as charged, Your Honor. Oh great! Now the pressure is on me, I guess. Me and my big mouth(comments). After reading your review of "The Hickory Farms' Massacre", I'm beginning to get nervous.
Are there any hydrogenated fats in the Guadalupe fruitcake? I can't remember.
Preservatives? I can't remember. Maybe. Oh, dear!
Was the reason it was so dark because there's a hint of prune hiding in there somewhere? I don't think so but how can I be sure?
Oh no, don't the Brothers of The Abbey also raise turnips somewhere on the farm, or did I merely dream that in a nightmare?
Now I'm in full blown panic mode!! All these questions that I can't answer with absolute certainty are going to pass under the cold discerning eye and taste buds of Judge Kyrk.
I await my day of reckoning with dread.
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